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Your Mom

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does anyone use lj anymore or is it just me? [09 Aug 2007|12:24pm]
[ mood | calm ]

it is a slow day at work. so slow, in fact, that i decided to come check out livejournal and see what's up. in doing this, i've realized that i haven't updated my lj in over a year. damn.. a lot of shit has happened since july last year. i will do my very best to update on everything, but i'm not even sure anyone will read this.. soooo.. whatev.

lets start with the big things:

- i got a new job. yes, my friends, i have left blockbuster and joined the 9-5 world. i work for a publishing company. we put out stock reccomendations. i do customer service so i answer phones and emails all day. when its slow, like today, i sit online all day and wander around. its cake. and pays wayyyy ridiculously better than blockbuster. although.. i think i may work one or two days a month for blockbuster still. can't really say no to extra cash :)

- tony and i moved out from my mom's in canton.. to his mom's basement in dundalk.. stayed there for a few months, then moved in with mandy and steven in hamilton. Things were a bit hectic there, with a newborn, 3 cats and 3 dogs along with tony and i and mandy and steven. we couldn't take being cooped up in a bedroom all the time, so we found ourselves an apartment in dundalk. we're so happy. we moved in at the very end of june. its perfect for us. its quiet and peaceful, and i'm just thrilled to walk around naked all the time :) now all we have to do is work on budgetting our money so we can live comfortably. its been pretty stressful but i think we'll be alright.

- wedding date is set for oct. 31st, 2008. georgia and i are on a hunt for the best place to have it. i already bought my dress.. its staying with my grandfather so i'm not tempted to wear it everyday and ruin it. i'm really excited about it. obviously if you've read my livejournal since the begining you know how long i've been waiting for this. its like all the bullshit i went through was just that.. and it was worth it. all of it. because a)i can say i told you so to everyone who doubted me or what i felt for tony. b)because well duh.. i get to marry the love of my life, the one.

i think thats all for the big things.. a lot of other things have happened, as things tend to do over the course of a year.. umm.. i started modeling..nothing spectacular, just pin-up stuff mostly and i only work with a select couple of photographers. i'm in it for fun, not for a career. you can see some pics on myspace.... uhhh.. my hair is getting longer, past my shoulders now.. i'm growing it out for the wedding. my grandfather (dad's dad) passed away about a month ago. it was a sad time for the whole family. speaking of my dad, we're on pretty good terms now and i'm really happy about that. and i think he likes tony. i never needed anyone's approval of who i loved, but having my family like the person i'm spending the rest of my life with is important to me. my friends are fantastic. my family is wonderful. the people i work with are awesome. everything in my life is coming together so nicely it makes me wonder why i was such a whiney bitch just a few years ago. it makes me glad i held on and stuck it out through all the bad times. makes me proud to know i got here on my own.

alright.. i think thats enough for now. i'll probably update more now that i have all this free time at work hahaha.

soo... how have all of YOU been?

5 Amens| And Shine Heaven Now

motha fuck [28 Jul 2006|03:58pm]
i never fucking update anymore.. sorry.
i never really have anything to say..

so i'm updating with some pictures...

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

moreCollapse )

the end.. off to watch the exorcism of emily rose :) bad-ass movie. i love courtroom dramas.. especially creepy ones.

peace out knuckles. <3
4 Amens| And Shine Heaven Now

storms. [23 Jun 2006|01:29pm]
there was so much electricity in the air last night.. the thunder was so loud it woke us up. then i couldn't get back to sleep because of the flashes of light coming through the window..

and then around 7:30 this morning, while tony was giving me a kiss goodbye and leaving for work, my grandmother died.

and i keep feeling selfish like this is just my pain.
she was a grandmother to other people too. and a mother. and a wife.

and not even that.. how many people die everyday? it's just every once in a while its someone you know.. and, on occation, its someone you love.

i'll tell you this though.. no one will ever have a better spagetti. no one will ever have better stories. no one will ever take me on better trips.

everybody that reads this go call someone you love and tell them.
because no matter how many times you say it, it never feels like enough in the end.
1 Amen| And Shine Heaven Now

[11 Jun 2006|10:07pm]
yeah sooo... its been so long since i've been on here that i totally missed our one year anniversary.. which was 6-6-6. how funny is that?

that's ok.. tony owes me panera bread now :)

i don't get online like i used to man.. i'm too busy all the time. hopefully this summer will calm down a little and we'll be able to relax.

georgia's wedding was beautiful and perfect. of course. heheh.. now it's time to start planning mine.. dun dun DUNNNNNNN

that's why i have the best planners ever as my brides maids.

i was out til 1:30am last night.. why am i awake at 10?!@?!

ok that's pretty much all i had to say. and sorry i don't update ever.. i'll try more. i promise.

what's new with you guys?
1 Amen| And Shine Heaven Now

old times.. [25 Apr 2006|03:05am]
[ mood | tired ]

i know its been a while since i've updated, and i'm sorry.. i'm starting to realize what it's like for those people who don't have time to sit on the internet for hours at a time like i used to. i miss it. i surrrrrre do. but i love my life so much that not being online all the time is ok.

i did have a few hours to sit online tonight since tony is staying at sean and dawn's.. and i got to get myself up to date with all the websites i used to frequent in the days of not having an outside life. heh.

i also got to talk to an old friend i hadn't talked to in oh.. two years? it was nice to catch up.. and the fact that he found me and started up the conversation was nice. he's in md at the moment for work and i'm definitely trying to hang out while i have the chance.. mebbe tony will come along. i'm sure they'd get along fantastically. the conversation got me thinking about old times.. how much fun i had.. and all the drama too i guess but mostly just the good times. i missed those times and i missed that whole group of people too. not just him, i started thinking about all the times i had with danielle too.. because if it wasn't for danielle and i hanging out i probably would never have met them. i'm rambling now so i'll stop.

what's new with me?

tony is teaching me how to golf.
georgia is getting married next month and my dress fits perfectly.
the marksman just finished recording.
they're also trying to get on warped tour this year so go vote for them!
tony and i will be tying the knot next halloween (2007).
i love my job again.. thanks to frank.. or should i say francis.
my mom cleaned and rearranged the house and it looks awesome.
tony is now an employee at the science center which is awesome.
girls' weekend at the beach was fantastic.
i bought a new bra and two new pairs of underwear.
dawn is a water nymph and i am an earth fairy and we are one with nature.
i'm tired as fuck and i have to be up at like 8:45 tomorrow.
i'm sleeping alone tonight, which sucks.
tony's helping sean out at work tomorrow and is sleeping over there.
we have no vehicle.
my face feels really soft.

the end.

1 Amen| And Shine Heaven Now

i was bored.. [20 Mar 2006|03:16am]
so i made me:

elouai&apos;s doll maker 3

and tony:

elouai&apos;s doll maker 3
2 Amens| And Shine Heaven Now

[15 Mar 2006|01:37am]
my mom and aunt are going to pass out when they come home and see what we've done to the house.. and tony and i are going to cry because that means we can't live here anymore :(

the place is actually liveable now.. it's actually becoming the really cute city house it has potential to be.. and we're gonna fix it up just to have to leave... blehhh..

um.. we watched the money pit tonight.. my first time seeing it. i pretty much know what they went through.. haha. not to that extent but uh.. yeah. holes in the ceiling.. leaks, broken stove..

ah fuck it. i'm tired. i'm going to bed. night.
And Shine Heaven Now

[07 Mar 2006|01:32pm]
i rarely even check livejournal anymore.. sorry guys. i feel kinda guilty about it. but i never have anything to say, really...

still work at blockbuster..
still engaged to tony..

tony got a sweet new job and it's looking like within 6 months he'll be making 6 figures.. so mebbe i wont be working at blockbuster anymore.. haha. syke.. tony says i have to so we can get free movies. haha.. so i'll work like 2-3 days a week. woot.
i also had a photoshoot with mandy with larry bradby. i loved it. so i guess i'm gonna try modeling out. i was nervous as shit the whole day, but as soon as i got in front of the camera, i felt right at home. it was.. envigorating.
we're house sitting for my mom and aunt right now.. they're in texas. my mom will be coming and going cause of georgia's wedding and all.. but apparently we pretty much have this house to ourselves until the end of the summer. sweet.

alright so i guess i did have a little to say.. heh.

oh, and since tony's gonna be making the big bucks.. we think we'll be able to have the wedding when we want it.. which is october 31st 2007. :)
6 Amens| And Shine Heaven Now

umm.. [13 Feb 2006|12:37am]
did i mention that tony proposed to me?

haha.. i'm retarded. i'm pretty fucking happy about everything though. i gotta take a picture of the ring and show it to you guys. it's reaaaal purty. :) most of you who read my entries have been reading them for years now so you all know how much this means to me. like seriously, i mean.. you know.. hahah whatever. you know. i'm gonna have a last name that no one can pronounce or spell. i love it. i still have to call my dad and tell him.. that may be a bit awkward but i hope he'll be happy and excited about it.

that's about all i have to talk about sooo.. i'll leave you all alone now.
8 Amens| And Shine Heaven Now

the trip. [09 Feb 2006|03:26pm]
[ mood | bouncy ]

ok.. quickest run-down i can give of the trip.. then pictures.

- flew to phoenix with brian billick
- tony put his hands on marylin monroe's
- drank at the rainbow room
- saw the whiskey a go go
- watched the superbowl and was disappointed
- lost all my money in vegas
- walked down the street drinking beers
- smoked in the hotel.. EVERYWHERE.. except the elevator
- got realllllly fucking drunk.. a lot
- got engaged

pics.. 50+Collapse )

there will be more when nathan sends me the ones he took.

oh yeah.. if you missed it up there i'll say it again...

i'm engaged.

28 Amens| And Shine Heaven Now

my bad.. [30 Jan 2006|02:49pm]
[ mood | chipper ]

i know it's been a while since i updated... sorry. the computer at home is weird and wont let us go on certain sites.. like myspace, and hotmail.. and we can check yahoo mail, but not respond to it.. gay.

and i can get on livejournal, but whenever i try to update it wont let me.. hense, no update.

but i'm at my mom's now.. so here's the update...

work is fine. lots to complain about, but lots to be happy about.. such is work.

family.. ok. nothing really to talk about.

love life.. lovely, as always.

mandy, tony and i will be leaving for CALI on friday :D and on monday we'll be in VEGAS BABY!!! i can't wait.. i'm trying to win $50k. hahaha.. but i'm so serious.. its gonna be a great trip. and nathan will be accompanying us.. which is awesome. its been too long since we've seen each other and i know tony will get a kick out of him. we're gonna check out a ketaset show too :)

umm... yeah i guess that's about it. i haven't been my camera-whore self lately either.. but i took a few today just so you guys can see my hair. it's hot, thanks to miss ally. andddd.. we got a new addition to the family, so i have pictures of him too.. and three pictures of something that was so fucking adorable i had to capture it.

so here they are..Collapse )

it's freaking BEAUTIFUL out today.. and i'll be at work as of 4pm.. by the time i get out of there it'll be cold again. ::sigh:: oh well... i'll be in la in a few days anyway. teehee.

i'm happy today. i am hungry though..

8 Amens| And Shine Heaven Now

i got my hizzy cizzy. [17 Dec 2005|08:27pm]
[ mood | anxious ]

it's getting very close to christmas now, and i'm still not done all the shopping i had planned. this was the first in about 4 years that i've actually had enough money to buy gifts for the people i love so i'm really excited. but i'm still broke as shit though. i can't do everything i really wanted to, but at least i can do a little something. this is my last night here in florida.. georgia and i are leaving around 3am to start the long drive home.. it's gonna be a LONG drive too.. with the two dogs and all. i'm eager to get back home, though i did have a lot of fun here and i love all their friends. i miss home. i miss my bed. and i miss tony. as sappy as it sounds, i'm pretty sure this is the most time we've spent apart since he came home from florida in june. not to mention when you start living with someone you get used to sleeping next to them every night. i miss that too. i've been coaxing marley into sleeping with me while i'm here. she's slick about it though.. she'll curl up next to me and wait til i fall asleep, then she'll sneak off into the other room. haha. i'm listening to jason mraz now.. and it's making me remember that i missed him in dc last monday. damnit. i really wanted to go to that show too.. i was going to drag tony along with me and make him like it. heh. oh well.. there's always another show. i feel really crampy. that blows. i got my hair cut today, while georgia was getting her roots did. nothing drastic, like usual.. i just got her to even it out and shit. its been almost 2 years since i got my hair professionally cut so.. as you can imagine it was REALLY uneven. she put some layers in it too.. think she might have taken like an inch off but it still looks the same for the most part. now i just have to worry about getting this color to go away.. i'm pretty much like silver now. haha. i'm thinking about a really deep brown.. mebbe some chunks of reds or lighter browns..? we'll see. i'll talk it over with the man too.. since i sprang the 'black' blue on him.

well my friends, its about 8:30 here.. 9:30 your time in bmore.. and i took a dramamine to make me sleepy so i can take some kind of nap before we head off.. so i suppose i'll lie down and try to rest. it would have been impossible without the sleepy pill, since i'm so anxious to get back home and see my baby. <-whatever. make fun of me all you want, i'm SAPPY!!!!

fuckin a man.. i'm really happy. i am. i feel so fullfilled with my life now. and shit will even be like 5million times more fullfilling when i finally start painting again.

fuck yeah.. .who says dreams don't fucking come true?

4 Amens| And Shine Heaven Now

[15 Dec 2005|07:52pm]
some pics from last night..Collapse )
And Shine Heaven Now

ok fine fine.. i found the cord! [05 Dec 2005|02:11pm]
[ mood | i am jack's drained heart ]

dun dun DUNNNNNNN....

Image hosted by Photobucket.com

SUPRISE!!! there is no photoshopping whatsoever in this photo. i wanted to leave this one alone, at least, to show you how freakin bright my hair is...

i bought 'bright black' hair dye.. it was loriel or something, good stuff.. and this is the result so... heheh. but i like it anyway. i just wanted a change and that's what i got.

moreCollapse )

15 Amens| And Shine Heaven Now

[05 Dec 2005|03:50am]
have i been away so long that nobody reads my el jay anymore? heh..

uhhhh.... i had pictures to post, but i seem to have lost the cord to plug the camera into the computer.. :-/

sorry. looks like you guys have to see me for real to see the drastic suprise.
3 Amens| And Shine Heaven Now

it's december... [04 Dec 2005|12:48am]
[ mood | cheerful, damnit. ]

that means i have to live up to expectations and be the cheeriest freakin person you'll come in contact with until the 1st of january...

and believe me, the universe is pushing me and testing the theory. but i stand tall and proud with a goofy smile on my face and warmpth in my heart knowing that this is the month that everyone loves everyone and people show the most compassion and houses light up with little blinking -or solid- lights and santa may or may not bring you the gift you want and reindeer fly and eat sugar cubes left out by little kids and people give and people get and trees are loved and stockings are hung and candles are lit and cats are in heat and dane cook hosts saturday night live.........

fuckin a man... i love the holiday season and i don't care what you throw at me, universe.

it took me too long and too much heartache to learn what i truely care about, what truely makes me happy, who truely matters to me to let a little thing like this get me down.

i made promises and i intend to keep them. on my honor. dead poets' honor, even. or, like a true ringer, we swears on.. the precious.

zorn is a unicorn.
blood rose.. find one.
875 delta.
july 403.

fucking werd.

some brilliant and beautiful person once told me 'i think you may be the only person who can actually put up with my shenanigans. i love that about you.
we have a crazy bond no matter the distance. i have no idea what im going to do from one day to the next or one minute to the next... i suprise myself sometimes but you have always been there no matter what'

that same person also said this: 'in the age of fleeting emotions and pasing girls, she was always there. hiding quietly in the background and never quite making a scene. i wished and longed to say something but never got up enough guff to do so. for good or ill it seemed like the right thing to do. and now as i counted my last remaing weeks in the great american south, the only thing i could think about was showing up at her door step, and saying hello'

and this: 'I dull the wait until that it does not see them so as to we can sweep like the wild beasts'

which, i think, means the most.

Sono qui per Lei sempre, il mio amore. tengo le mie promesse.

and now this.. because fuck it, that's me.Collapse )

2 Amens| And Shine Heaven Now

ok check it. [27 Nov 2005|02:41am]
this is gonna be short. i expected myself to write a really long entry tonight but now i just can't.

bottom line is:

'mebbe you should just stay at your mom's tonight'

errrrr... yeah.

but fuck it. because guess what?


jesuschristcorex. i'm fucking ecstatic.

sleeping alone still sucks though.
2 Amens| And Shine Heaven Now

i know, i know.. [13 Nov 2005|12:38pm]
it's been a while.. i'm sorry. i never really feel like i have time to update anymore.. which is kinda funny cause i'm never really that busy. well, i guess i am.

things at work are normal.. i guess. my raise finally went through so that's good. and i'll be getting another one next month. next month is christmas, can you believe that? i am so not prepared for it. i need to start figuring out what i'm getting people.. and saving up money for that matter.. a little late, huh?

uhhh.... going to atlantic city tomorrow :) mebbe i'll win 13908502978346723 dollars. heh..

things with tony are lovely.. i'm living with him now. i need to get the rest of my clothes from my mom's and bring them over though.. i have a limited supply here. heheh.

alright i don't know what to say anymore.. i think i'm done. time to get dressed and go to sean and dawn's for some good food and football.
5 Amens| And Shine Heaven Now

[30 Oct 2005|02:58pm]
the little halloween banner thing that livejournal has now is really cute.

and frank in the ghost outfit.. adorable.

yes, i'm a dork.

tony and i went and got what we needed to complete our costumes today.

AND i got myself a winter coat for 7 bucks. woot. <3thriftstore shopping<3
And Shine Heaven Now

'it says puncture.. i'm puncturing' [29 Oct 2005|08:08pm]
when i was very young, i thought the world owed me. i walked around with a grudge against everyone and everything and felt betrayed and treated unfairly, but never knew why.

i grew up a bit, and thought that i owed the world. i was self-righteous and sincerely believed that i could and would make a difference.

now, i know that i don't owe anyone anything, and no one owes me anything either.

wait.. that's not true. mandy and dustin owe me dinner. ;)
And Shine Heaven Now

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